Sunday, March 17, 2013
I Need To Stop Attracting Taken Men
Do I have some big sign above my head that says, "Laura J: Open for threesomes and casual sex with taken men"? Because I'm not. Not in the slightest. Sure, I'm open about my sexuality when asked, and I blog about the female body; but that doesn't mean I'm all about being a toy to suppress the sexual wanderings of taken men.
I'm a classy woman with a passionate heart... not a shallow sex toy. That's what I feel like when they ask me this- that they want me to be their toy. If a couple were to have a threesome with me, it would be to add more spice to their relationship... but what would it do for me? At the end of the day, they hold each other's hearts and I would be discarded like a used condom. Maybe some people are okay with this arrangement, but I'm not. It's very selfish of a couple to ask this of me. I'm a classy woman, and just because I'm comfortable with my sexuality and listening to others talk about theirs doesn't mean I'm a play thing.
I recently asked my other girlfriends if they have run into this problem before, and they had no idea what I was talking about. Apparently, It's just me.
And it's heartbreaking to keep witnessing taken men go after me. Sometimes these taken men are amazing, and I could see myself being with them if they were single. Other times they are pigs. Either way, these constant advances wear at the heart strings.
Honestly, if it was just one instance, I wouldn't care. Whatever. But I have been asked to do "things" with at least 3 different taken guys since new years and that's just recently. There have been dozens more before then.
It's also heartbreaking hearing so many men in "healthy" "loving" relationships wanting everything from flirting to sex from other women. I understand that in today's society, open relationships and polyamorous marriages are more common, and I'm not disgusted by the idea; but it's not the type I want to partake in personally. I'm a very trusting person in relationships, but hearing so many men wanting more than their one woman makes me distrust them and feel self conscious about myself when I would otherwise very confident.
I'm direct. I don't lead men on. When I'm interested, I tell them so; and when I'm not, I tell them so. Maybe this directness is only appealing to men in relationships? I'm not sure.